I'll just leave this here

This is for those who want to know about my thoughts, leave a comment if you're interested.

Why don't you go ahead and have a seat right over there....

Interesting Paths

I figure that I want to pursue many things, but creativity hasn't been there at my call like it normally is. I have become lax in my mental discipline, and many of the things I used to do for rejuvenation I have come away from. It seems that the maintenance of my system is integral to its performance. If I neglect the form, then the functions also suffer. Its easy to think only in the physical manifestations of things, and ignore the root of them, which is what really brings results.
Yeah that stuff

Letting Go

I take alot of responsibility on myself for others actions. There are many of us who do. If someone reacts to us in any way, either positive or negative, we believe that we are responsible for it. The concept that others react negatively because of something I have done still lingers. There's a very subliminal thought process that says, Something I did created this, and so something I do can change it. This is not the case. If I am not responsible for other people's problems then I am also not responsible for the solution. Its best that I contribute only what I want. What I want to contribute is happiness, love, and peace. It helps me to think that we are not all engaged in a reactive web of reactions, but rather that we all are wholly responsible for our own thoughts, feelings, and actions. When you adopt a view that we are all simply projecting according to our own free will, then you are empowered to bring into the world what you choose, rather than being forced by the pressures of a situation to react a certain way. When we see ourselves as responsible for our own actions, then we see others as responsible for theirs. We then have the power to bring into the world the things of our choosing. Instead of focusing on what others are doing to decide your course, you focus on what you want as the principle motivation for action. Once you have this you are free from the burden of reactivity. How other people react to you is not your responsibility, it is theirs. It isn't that other people's actions disappear, its just that you begin to focus less on what they do, and more on what you do. It only makes sense seeing as you have no power over them, and only control your own actions. Your control center has been placed within you, and within others, for a reason. I don't know why we were given free will, but it makes sense to use it in the capacity it was intended. When we attend only to ourselves, focus on what we want to bring, and then bring it, we can free ourselves from the hassles of 'others based thinking'. After all, we are the only ones we control, therefore we should exercise that control in exactly that capacity.

Disposable Humans

Now in trial size!

I am still surprised at our ability to use and discard one another, at our complete ignorance to human worth, and how little love we have in our lives and in our hearts. We think love is a nice thing, but it isn't The thing. It isn't a goal for life, if anything its something to keep in mind, a nice addendum. Most people regard each other as objects, only interested in what they can provide for each other. They have no love for one another, only desire, a desire for something that they lack in their hearts, which is love. When we seek ourselves in others, we look past the person, and see only what they can give us. People really can be cruel, but it isn't that they intend to be, it is only a result of not knowing. When you cannot find the worth of others, then you can also not find your own worth. You wander without purpose or meaning, and those people if anything require sympathy and patience, not judgment.
The world brings many things our way, and it is not those things that matter, but what we do that matters. Once we focus so much on fashioning and establishing ourselves, then we don't even react to those things of life that buffet us. We only act in accordance with our own principles. I have chosen to love and give love when it has not been offered me, especially when it hasn't been offered me. They are so lost in their apathy and hatred that they do not want, or appreciate such an extraordinary gift, and it only reflects the insignificant position they have given love in their heart. To those of us who regard love as not worth the pursuit, we are rewarded with the due result of our efforts, a life that is lacking in the love we do not pursue, and so our lives remain lacking. Love seems to be that little more that everyone wants, that we miss, whose absence we feel always.
The practice of tossing other people aside when they have nothing to give us has become so prolific in our culture, that it is not only considered normal, but justified. The great majority of people will react adversely to one who treats them adversely, almost as though the burden of their focus relies on others, and not on themselves. In life it is not what is done to us, but what we do that matters. Meaning comes from within, and those who seek meaning in others are seeking it externally but it can only be found internally. There is no external refuge - Buddha. How we relate to others says nothing about them, and everything about us. If we cast others aside, it speaks of our apathy, and coldness. If we are angry with others, it shows that we are the servants of anger. And if we love others, then it shows us to be giving, loving people. What we do with each other shows the merits of our attitudes and behaviors. Not everyone has the same high opinion of love, and most of live our lives with not nearly enough love in it, compared to what we could have. The more we know about love the greater it becomes, and the more obvious its importance becomes in our lives.

Continuing my Quest

My pursuit of love continues, and even though the ones I love continue to give up on what they could achieve, I will not give up on them. Times like these can be liberating, as they free me to refocus my energies within and renew my motivation and adjust my direction. Any time you are having a difficult time with life, stop focusing on life and start focusing on you.
I have found a great love in Rachel, and I will keep on trying to help her find that great love for me. I hope to bring many others to achieve greater heights within themselves, and many times we focus on the externals to motivate us. We depend on other people to decide how much we will give, and what we want to give takes second place. I want to give and share and grow in love, and so that is what I will do, and that is what I will give to her.
I look forward to starting this new blog. Myspace's best feature was the blog anyway. Now that I can devote myself fully to my writing and not expend energy on social networking, I will have more resources available to pursue my work.
Happy Holidays to you all. I am glad for every moment of my small life.